The Mystery Men
—by Nathan on September 3, 2009—
A few nights ago, my dad, mom, and I watched a humorous flick regarding super heroes. This movie is based upon a comic published by Dark Horse Comics. The story line is that Champion City's number 1 hero, Captain Amazing, is taken hostage by his enemy Casanova Frankenstein, a diabolical nut-ball. Seven unlikely heroes gather to become a fighting force to save the hero. Alone, they aren't that good. Together, they aren't much better...until the forces of teamwork rest upon their heads. Here are the supers:
Mr. Furious: His incredible power comes from his rage. But the question remains...when will he show it? He seems to get mad and start spewing how angry he is and how people will regret it when they make him mad. Does he even have powers?
The Shoveler: A father with a dying marriage, the Shoveler goes about whacking villains on the head with a shovel. Called "the best shoveler in the world", the hero has to to choose to be the best shoveler in the world, or the best father in the world.
The Blue Raja: He throws forks. That's it. There's nothing blue in his costume, but there is plenty of flowers. He steals his mother's silverware for weapons and talks in an English accent. Out of all the heroes, he may be the most pathetic of all! Throws forks? Why not knives?
The Bowler: Her father, a champion bowler, fell down an elevator shaft and died. Now, she keeps his skull in a bowling ball and throws him around at the bad guys. She's pretty good at it too. Her mission is one of revenge, and she might even be willing to go any lengths to fulfill it...
The Spleen: Uh...how can I put this? His power STINKS! It's stupid BUTT funny at the same time. He's a valuable...asset to the team, but he's kind of on the oddball side.
Invisible Boy: He can only turn invisible when no one's looking at him, and can turn visible when they someone does. Makes you think he's not the most truthful fellow, eh? It seems kind of strange, don't you think? Hey, he's a teenage boy, but he may just prove his worth yet.
The Sphinx: It's rumored that this man of great mystery can slice guns in half with his mind. He is the one who must mold these unlikely heroes into a well-oiled team. His words of wisdom are often wise words (Guh, that didn't come out right!).
These seven individuals must prove themselves worthy of Champion City's respect and praise. They also must defeat the insane Frankenstein before his evil plot destroys everyone who would even give these Mystery Men praise! Also, can Captain Amazing be saved? Or will he fall into the ever-grasping hands of death!
Excelsior! (Wait, wrong comics company)